Sunday, November 30


At the moment I feel cold.
By allowing myself
To fully experience the bitterness,
.......................................................I feel it moving through me

Like the freezing rain and fog outside my window.
To do otherwise,
This tormented and twisted bitterness
Would surely enslave soul.

So very cold.

Thursday, September 11

From my experience 7 years ago

At about 1 am Pacific time on September 11, 2001 I was unable to sleep. As I awoke I was over come with powerful emotions and was then "opened" to a horrific vision that lasted until 5 am. At exactly 6:11 am I was awakened to the the sound of breaking glass, followed by extreme silence.

This first poem is from my vision, and the one after it is from my emotions and feelings from the next few days. This was for me, as it was for so many a very intense week in my life. May my experience bring you peace, insight, and love.

I love you all,


Poems follow

William, it's time to Wake Up

William, they call my name
Arriving one by one how the beautiful
Sound of tinkling bells fills my room
An exquisite delicate ringing
That only Angels make

It is the Ninth month, the eleventh morning
Nine – One – One, Wake up! Wake up!
Each with a bell speaking as one
Uncountable hundreds or more
A symphony of Divine Gentleness

My heart pounds, searing burning pain
Rips through my chest as a 10,000-megawatt
Lightening bolt of fear brings grim images
Gasping, no air reaches my lungs as death
Revisits those who would deliver death

Over, and over, and over again
An appetite unquenchable
Senseless Meaningless Horrific
Go ahead, kill me!
I’ll kill you right back!

The glorious bells return
Softly, tenderly I am brought back
Blue green bright numbers on the bedside
Clock; 11 minutes after 6 am
3000 miles away it is 9:11 am

Nine – One – One; Nine – One – One
William! Wake up! Wake up!
Hundreds of Angels newly made bring Divine
Wisdom from the path they walked this day
Remember us by learning the lesson we bring

It is time to put away childish things
The time for killing is over
Let go of hate and fear
Love calls you through an open door
At 12 minutes after 9 today’s lesson begins

Poem 2

Where the Love Light Shines & the Freedom Bell Rings

Early morning misty memory
How small I felt standing before your
Beauty and greatness in awe I trembled
The immense power of your embrace
Wrapped and caressed by the loving folds of
Your swift and passionate ever-beating heart
Holding my hand we walked together
Each step my amazement grew like so many
Who lovingly call you simply, the City
The images now fresh and sharp as though
Freshly developed on the silver white paper
Of the wonderful photographs you gave me

Uncontrolled weeping takes me by surprise
In a flash it is gone only to return moments later
Hours pass as my soul pours itself out in
Response to the horror of last Tuesday’s madness
Gut wrenched soul, quenched by tears, God! Let the healing begin
Unable to stand in a heap I fall to my knees
Shaking and sobbing I wail and gasp for air
Finally I am released, standing, no, leaning on
Something eyes swelled shut I find myself
In the kitchen; raisins, flakes, milk, bowl and spoon
From an unknown deeper wellspring I am overcome
Tears and cereal mix, my chest heaves as I leave for work

Could it be the words, “Please enjoy your stay”
When your passport was stamped that so angers
You as your drive past the shopping mall?
Maybe it was the joyful noise of innocent children
As they played in the park at the end of
Your street that has filled you with such rage?
No! The darkness you carry came with you
Your well-learned lessons of hatred and murder
Silently covered by your smile as you ask when
There will be more of the Granny Smith apples on sale
In this land of plenty where all are welcomed as family
Your teacher’s words ring in your head “Kill these godless dogs”

Brother, your teacher has deceived you
Blinded and filled with hatred his darkness prevents
You from seeing the glorious light surrounding you
This seething torrent of rage you have been fed
Now burning hot in your breast driving you towards
This bitter path that ends in your own violent destruction
Your master is safe, hearing of your loss he does not weep
Waiting and watching for the river of innocent blood
Hoping to open the floodgates of fear; his disappointment grows
Over looking your anger and hatred on the wings of
Precious Angels you are carried into the next world
Perhaps, now you will appreciate the gifts you have taken

Hiding behind robes given by false clerics
Deceiver of my brothers and sisters
The Great Light reveals the lies you teach
Like some long frozen prehistoric fossil
Freshly raised from the sub-Antarctic darkness
Your hatred and violence has no place in our world
Like the fool who argues with himself your own madness
Daily recreates for you a nonexistent enemy
Crazed by hatred, rage has murdered your own family
Your own hand exposes your dark purpose
You sell the persona of the lion of the desert, but
The light of truth reveals the common sewer rat

How frustrated you must now be
In your fantasy you believed by your fear
Freedom could be brought to its knees
Behold! There in the harbor a light brightly burns
Steadfast and powerful she stands
The light of love raised high, liberty has not fallen!
Tears of pride flow in her eyes as she watches
The Bravest, the Finest, the Strongest and the Work-a-day
Every day heroes pressed hard again into service
Risking their own lives to ensure the safety of others
In beauty, the students of compassion and love display their mastery
These the grandchildren of the once huddled masses

Just a moment ago I saw two holding hands
Brother and sister, tall and bright shining twins
In the blink of an eye they have disappeared
Shattering the heavens a great bell has been rung
God has reached out her hand, the very ground
Heaves and shakes as if giving birth
What is this? Growing slowly at first bit by bit
A mountain now reaches to the sky
In memory of those two beautiful twins
Wait! Look at what the light has revealed
Bright shining gems each one brilliant and special the
Unseen wellspring of heavens’ most precious treasure

For over two centuries the Master Smithy
Pumps the great bellows that drives
An eternal fire of blazing white-hot love
Rarely seen until This Smithy came to town
In his hand is held a precious many-colored alloy
Glowing brightly while a Mighty Hammer
Repeatedly pounds and forges it into a shape
Made for a purpose only His keen eyes can see
Each generation is pounded anew in a searing white hot
Moment of truth that hammer forges the generations together
Those who choose to test the metal of His Forge have invited
The freedom bell to ring, oh what a lovely sound it is!

Copyright ©2001 William A. York, All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, August 16

Bus is late again!

So here I sit in the hot, hot sun, waiting for the bus!

Summer heat

Ok so 2 days of back to back triple digit heat! Ouch!

Saturday, July 26

Drawing for my Drawing class

Ths drawing of this "forest timekeeper" faerie was for my final portfolio reveiw in my drawing 1 class. I got and "A" on the drawing and that also gave me an "A" for the class. w00t!

Thursday, May 29

Oh love!

~ An Open Door ~

So many years
Intensity gripped my heart
From birth to now

Be still

Not seen as if
Never approaching
As common as grass

Be still

Before me wide
Open as though
Was I expected?

Be still

Certainly not
What I expected
Shivering, trembling awe

Be still

Not barred by it
Backwards known to well
Freely I step through


Breathing in but
Not enough, winded
Nothing to stand on

Be Calm

All is released
Fallen away into
Loving past. Darkness only

Be Calm

All reference to
Any former vanishes
Tentatively, floating nothingness


Nothing, only everything
Empty, yet full
Opened fully to the embrace

Be light

Light, only light
Flowing outward loving
The light embrace

Be light

Watching light and darkness
Lovingly, gently,dancing
Together, merging in me

En-light-ness, En-dark-ness

Fully becoming
Not surrounding not
Filling. Both and neither

Be fearless

Solid fully standing
On sacred no-ground
Moment, no passing, moment

Be fearless

I am lifted no
I lift myself
Flying past seeming knowledge


Knowing is now
Devoid of knowledge
Separation never was

Be safe

Always at hand
Living unseen in
Each forgotten breath

Be safe

Sunrise, no, not on
The distant shore. Sunrise
The heart-breath flows


Immense and powerful
Weighted and heavy
Holds me, cannot move

Be Peace

Seen clearly now
Danger never was
Defense and attack only choices

Be Peace

Huge gentleness becoming
Free and flowing harmless
Stillness, calmness only safety


Through the open
Doorway traveled many
To where it begins

Be Love

Becoming free only
To voice love, in total surrender
Releases others to become love

Be Love

Seeing only love instead
Of form no longer distanced
You are me, I am you

Be Love

Peace through the doorway
Of letting go unclenches
The heart knowing only love


Love is without
Need and returns as
You are filled, filling another

Oh, love!


Tuesday, May 6

For Michael

Holding you close, always.

My beloved Michael, cherishing the infinite space in my heart you will forever occupy. Love is not bound by time, nor distance, nor dimensions. Wherever you are, and no matter where I am, our hearts will always find each other.

Our thirty years together was merely the doorway to the infinite that awaits us both, when my tears of grief are transformed into tears of joy. May our next adventure be as glorious as this last one.




Last night was hard for me. So much fear, terror, even. Lasted for 6 hours, I don't remember falling asleep, but it was well after 3 am.

Sadly, now I know why. (holding back a flood of emotions and tears) My oldest and dearest male friend, Michael, whom I have known since 1978 has had a massive stroke while living and teaching in South Korea. The doctors say that if he wakes up today he will be a vegetable but that it is more likely that he will not survive that long.

Sobbing, uncontrollable convulsive waves of tears, I love you Michael,..............

Too much grief.

Wednesday, April 16


The process of defining is also the process of creating limits. When I say "I know" I am really announcing that I do not know. When it is announced that "this is the way", the way has already become obscured.

Give me an experience of you who you are, of your genuine being-ness and I will be present with you for hours and perhaps a lifetime.

Talk to me about what you believe, and after about 10 minutes I will have better things to do.

Talk to me about your accomplishments from the past, and I will not be moved.

Share with me an idea and your willingness to make it real, in a way that we can accomplish together, and I will stand by your side, so intimately, that the sweat of our combined efforts will hit the ground as a single drop, and I will pray that our journey together never ends.

Tell me how to be, and I promise, I will be, not that.

Allow me to be naked in your presence, and I will be with you forever.

If I open myself to you fully, how will you respond?



Thursday, March 27


Past the great river
Descending cherry blossoms
Walking more deeply

A Torture Soul

(This was my final essay for my wr-121 class at MHCC. It is an "A" paper and I received and "A" for the course as well)

A Tortured Soul 

     BOOM! You are jolted awake, hooded men in black uniforms, having kicked down your door, burst into your bedroom. They throw you face down to the floor and bind your hands. A hood is shoved over your head and its “zip-tie” is cinched, tightly around your neck. Sharply a needle into your arm, you begin to loose consciousness. The sound of your wife, screaming hysterically, is the last sound you hear. You awaken to find that you have been transported thousands of miles beyond the sovereign borders of your homeland and are a prisoner in one of the now, not so secret, CIA sponsored interrogation centers in Afghanistan. You have just experienced what the current US administration refers to as extraordinary rendition, or what you and I would call kidnapping. Still in your hood, two men grab you, strap you to a hard flat board, raise your feet slightly above your head, as cold water is poured over your nose and mouth in order to “simulate” repeated drowning. This, so called, “aggressive interrogation” technique, known as waterboarding, was first used by the Spanish Inquisition. It is endorsed and used by US officials in the interrogation of those individuals suspected of terrorism. On March 8th, 2008, President Bush had before him a bill that would ban such torture techniques from being used by any US officials or agencies. He chose to veto it. His reason was clear, stating that, “Because the danger remains, we need to ensure our intelligence officials have all the tools they need to stop the terrorists. ”, (Bush 2). Despite swearing an oath, “…to preserve, protect and defend the Constitution,…” (Constitution 29), President Bush has, with a single, vorpal-like, stroke of his pen, struck at the heart of our nations moral compass, the very soul of our nation. When a great nation, that often claims great moral authority, by virtue of their past actions, and a treasured and tested set of governing, or guiding principles, chooses to abandon those ideals, ignore the moral compass of our Constitution, then the nation itself becomes lost, depressed, and experiences the loss of its soul.

The argument for torture is a simple one. Apply enough emotional or physical duress to an individual, and he or she will tell you what you wish to know. Unfortunately, dozens of career General Officers, numerous high ranking US officials and agencies such as the FBI disagree. Former Republican Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee, in his debate with Senator John McCain, said this about the subject of torture,

"Waterboarding is torture, and torture violates the moral code of Americans and jeopardizes the country's security,... when we go to the point of violating our own moral code,… then instead of advancing our country, its safety and our security, we in fact jeopardize it...What we don't get is reliable information. What we do get is a challenged soldier who has participated in something that goes against not only his or her own moral code but against our own sense of justice in this country, "(Huckabee, You Tube).

What then, of this question of soul loss or damage? Robert Crawford, writes in an article entitled, Abuse puts soul of our nation at risk, for the Seattle Post Intelligencer,

"People who see the image of God in every human being cannot tolerate officially sanctioned torture,… If one knows of an evil and does not act, one becomes a "bystander" -- a person who by choosing to be silent enters into complicity with the evil witnessed. Torture is an absolute degradation of human dignity. Despite official denials, multiple sources have documented that torture has been widespread and systematic, up to and even including homicide. The question has become a stark one: Are we a society ruled by law? Or are we ruled by a president who proclaims his right to ignore the law, ignore the Constitution, dodge congressional and judicial oversight and exercise unlimited power in the name of national security?", (Crawford 3, 4, 7).

The individuals who wrote both the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution were, even by today’s standards, highly educated and deeply spiritual in both belief and practice.

Words like endowed, unalienable and liberty were chosen with great care. In the very beginning of both the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution, the writers of these documents chose to impart, “soul-level” qualities in the forming of our nation. “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all Men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights” (Declaration 9). This singular phrase is the central reason, that so many see the United States, as a leader in the championing of individual rights. When combined with the other major soul quality, that of liberty, this country has set the worldwide standard for freedom. The word liberty has enhanced significance. It is mentioned in the very beginning of both of our Nation’s founding documents. It is this essential soul quality of liberty, so central to our nations founding ideals, that makes even the mere thought of torture so abhorrent.

When a nation who once possessed a strong moral compass, with a very clear idea of its guiding principles, repeatedly chooses to ignore and violate those values most sacred to it, then we risk the destruction of our national soul. Passing laws that are capable of stripping away our constitutionally guaranteed right of personal liberty, or by vetoing those laws that would restore and defend those rights and by reclassifying some citizens as terrorists, for the sole purpose of allowing them to be kidnapped, tortured and in some cases murdered, is an unholy violation of the soul of our nation. As Americans, we must demand that our President restore our nations honor, by fulfilling his sworn oath of office, to preserve, protect and defend the Constitution. So help him God!

Works Cited

Bush, George W. "President's Weekly Radio Address." The White House Press Office, Washington, D.C. 8 Mar. 2008. 11 Mar. 2008

Cato Institute. The Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States of America. Washington, D.C: Cato Institute, 2002.

Crawford, Robert. "Abuse puts soul of our nation at risk." Seattle Post Intelligencer 30 Mar. 2006. 11 Mar. 2008

Huckabee: You Tube Debate. Dir. You Tube. Perf. Mike Huckabee. You Tube, 2008.